So I use to be that guy that couldn't stand any kind of change whatsoever, oh wait, I'm still that guy! Not entirely though, I have realized the value of change and how necessary it is for our growth, both spiritually and emotionally- who cares about financially.
Lately I have had such a difficult time adjusting to the new shift, 12pm-9pm. I feel so disorganized and out of routine. I am extremely thankful to have a job right now so by no means am I actually complaining! My life was pretty chaotic there for a while- I had band practice on Mondays, nothing on Tuesdays but normally it got filled with something, Mens group on Wednesday nights, Volleyball on Thursday nights, and band practice again on Friday nights. Thankfully I quit volleyball a few weeks anyway so that's not something I am missing out on anymore. I just really value my time with my friends at band practice, and the time I get with the guys on our Wednesday night bible studies. I really hope that this shift won't last too long because I need those things in my life- they are extremely important to me. I think one of the awesome things about getting older is that you begin to see what is important to you and necessary, you start cutting out all the excess and garbage.
God has seriously been teaching me a lot about patience and really trying to reshape a lot of my thinking. I take a look back over the years and realize how like every lesson that I have learned, it's been the hard way! Why is that? I've got wisdom. I think I am fairly intelligent with some good insight. Oh wait, I always let my heart lead me. 26 yrs into life I am realizing the need for checks and balances, sometimes I just wish my brain would check my heart against the glass like an angry Canadian hockey player on steroids... I guess if it did that I probably wouldn't be breathing, but you get the stupidity and stubbornness on my part. I take a look though and can clearly see how God has been molding me for bigger and greater things during the course of all the "junk" that I have had to go through- I just have to remind myself that it's all to bring him glory in the end.
Time to meet the guys for lunch, some Christmas shopping, and band practice- I am sooo in need of rocking out with the guys tonight; I feel I've got a lot of energy and "stuff" to just dump into music tonight!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Breath of Fresh Air
Once again I start an entry about how its been a while since I last posted, seems to be a common thread for me that I'm going to have to shake! Things in my life have been going soo incredibly well over the past month that I honestly can not thank God enough for all that he has done!
Things with my job are going extremely well. I feel that I am catching on pretty quickly and someone said that I sounded like a "Season Advisor" on the phones- that someone was actually the head trainer, which was pretty cool to hear that from. Today I actually had a call though where a woman was needing to withrdaw because of medical issues- shes been in and out of the hospital with seizures and was often incoherent, needing me to repeat myself many times over- it was really heart breaking. I honestly feel such a burden for those folks and realize that is an opportunity for me to share the love of God with that individual, just to encourage them, support them, empathize with them. It certainly makes me miss counseling! Something I have learned recently though is that everyone who has lost interest in their job, there is soo much more that we do, we truly do impact the futures of people; we are their one true level of support. I just pray that God gives me the strength and know how to be good stewards of those contacts- as well as just friends that I have in my life.
Recently I have felt that I have truly been walking in the spirit; just filled with the joy from the love that God has for me. It seems so often that we allow life to quench the joy from our spirits, to bring us down, distract us, in many cases, cripple us. There have been a lot of changes going on in my life as of late; but every single one of them has been change that will ultimately bring glory to God. Where I stand today is a place in my faith that I wish I could maintain, that I could feel this joy every waking day in my life, to completely overwhelmed by his love for me, that never ceases, is never dependent on what I can do right, not even what I do wrong. It scares me because in April I felt so close to God, then I made some decisions regarding relationships with people that quenched it, brought me down, didn't uplift my spirit the way that I thought it would. Ive realize for myself that I want to be at 100% with my walk with God, I want to surround myself with people that are seeking the same; bottom line- people should never fill a void in your faith, they should strengthen it beyond the potential that you have.
So I will be starting my masters soon.... I am soo confused. I love counseling and have a real passion for helping people- but, I don't know if that is where God wants me........ its either that or MA in Worship Studies. I have such a strong passion for music, for worship, for leading others in worship, I really feel called to music ministry (which I am currently doing with the band) but Im just not certain how far I need to take it. I guess the good thing is that I have some time before I can even start taking classes... hopefully God can give me a clear picture before then!
Im going to finish being lame- doing laundry and pray that we don't get this snow tomorrow! It looks like Im the only one that hopes it passes us haha- I actually enjoy going to work!
Things with my job are going extremely well. I feel that I am catching on pretty quickly and someone said that I sounded like a "Season Advisor" on the phones- that someone was actually the head trainer, which was pretty cool to hear that from. Today I actually had a call though where a woman was needing to withrdaw because of medical issues- shes been in and out of the hospital with seizures and was often incoherent, needing me to repeat myself many times over- it was really heart breaking. I honestly feel such a burden for those folks and realize that is an opportunity for me to share the love of God with that individual, just to encourage them, support them, empathize with them. It certainly makes me miss counseling! Something I have learned recently though is that everyone who has lost interest in their job, there is soo much more that we do, we truly do impact the futures of people; we are their one true level of support. I just pray that God gives me the strength and know how to be good stewards of those contacts- as well as just friends that I have in my life.
Recently I have felt that I have truly been walking in the spirit; just filled with the joy from the love that God has for me. It seems so often that we allow life to quench the joy from our spirits, to bring us down, distract us, in many cases, cripple us. There have been a lot of changes going on in my life as of late; but every single one of them has been change that will ultimately bring glory to God. Where I stand today is a place in my faith that I wish I could maintain, that I could feel this joy every waking day in my life, to completely overwhelmed by his love for me, that never ceases, is never dependent on what I can do right, not even what I do wrong. It scares me because in April I felt so close to God, then I made some decisions regarding relationships with people that quenched it, brought me down, didn't uplift my spirit the way that I thought it would. Ive realize for myself that I want to be at 100% with my walk with God, I want to surround myself with people that are seeking the same; bottom line- people should never fill a void in your faith, they should strengthen it beyond the potential that you have.
So I will be starting my masters soon.... I am soo confused. I love counseling and have a real passion for helping people- but, I don't know if that is where God wants me........ its either that or MA in Worship Studies. I have such a strong passion for music, for worship, for leading others in worship, I really feel called to music ministry (which I am currently doing with the band) but Im just not certain how far I need to take it. I guess the good thing is that I have some time before I can even start taking classes... hopefully God can give me a clear picture before then!
Im going to finish being lame- doing laundry and pray that we don't get this snow tomorrow! It looks like Im the only one that hopes it passes us haha- I actually enjoy going to work!
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